For some reason I seem to be experiencing a vague foreboding. Like a small cloud of some sort of oppression— a hovering chill; trouble looking for somewhere to strike–maybe around the next turn.
I have no idea what it is, or why…but it’s there…riding the winds from the north
Our autumn days wax and wane from warm to cold and back again to repeat as the leaves change and flutter to the ground. There is a tingle to air promising winter is not far off now.
On chill days the wood stove heats the house; two cats and our dog; and a toasting husband. The knots of burning elm tick faintly as they pop and burn warming the air.
And still I feel it…that unsettled feeling…like the night air breathing on my neck. (If I were a cat my fur would be lifted in alarm.)
Oh, well…I continue forward. There is nothing much else to do…we ride out checking the corn, measuring the dryness (16%—when it reaches 15% we can start harvesting)
Sitting around worrying is time wasted.
We ride (skimming) through the farm, on roads which which sometimes look like wild pathways…over the Coyote trails and onto Coyote Hill… the little trip makes me think of all the old, ancient ones who walked here way before me.
For this I give thanks, ask for protection for this land I love, all the living things on it, and for my husband and children and the children of my children, and you, my friends; protection and safety for you, also.
Then I wait…maybe whatever this feeling is will dissipate and go away.
The warmth of a light heart will return— I can travel each day with ease.
I am ready for that time to come!
From my world to your heart,
Linda
Are you perhaps dreading the onset of long, dark nights and cold, short days? You’ve always struck me as a person who always turns her face to the sun, and winter may not be your happy time…
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Winter is always hard…I hope it is just a mourning for summer.
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Me too….
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I have been feeling the same thing this fall. Wonder if it is because of the constant barrage of disaster news we are inundated by. Whatever it is I don’t like it much. Take care, good friend.
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I know…it’s terrible this feeling….
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J > You capture very well the mood of autumn turning from early to late.
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The dying of summer. Sigh!
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I hope your sense of foreboding is NOT a sign of things to come. Hopefully the beauty around your farm will cause that feeling to go away and be replaced by the light heart. God’s blessings on you and all your family.
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Thank you…I hope so also!
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I always feel unsettled and restless when I know the sun has gone away.
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Maybe that is it…the ending of the sun season!
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I have had a number of people telling me lately they feel like this – all American – I wonder if it is the onset of the darker seasons or maybe there is some widespread emotional fatigue occurring. It is hard to keep up ..
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It sure is unsettling. I have stopped listening, reading of watching the news…it just makes the feeling worse!
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Many people are doing the same – I wonder if that is the plan
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Hummmm Possibly….I didn’t think of that!
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Beautifully expressed. I feel the same way. I think the onslaught of unsettling news makes it almost impossible not to feel that way. And speaking for myself, I can say that our president’s character has also a lot to do with why I feel that way. He thrives on conflict, he keeps himself in the headlines by ruffling, unsettling, undoing, unraveling. He doesn’t want us to be calm. Because if we were, we wouldn’t be reading about him. And besides all that, I have always always found October to be the most unsettling month of them all.
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My best friend’s Mom hated Autumn, she felt like it was the season of death. I’ve never felt like this in Autumn before, but maybe that is what I’m feeling.
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We hope the same for you and for all of us!
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Safety and peace! YES!!!
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Linda, are you somewhat psychic? Your comments are interesting and I hope you’re not right. But I will send up extra prayers just in case. Hope your corn dries fast and that you can get all of your crop out of the ground and into the trucks and on their way before too long. I know you don’t much like winter, so will hope that it is an easy one for you this year. Peace to you!
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Dear Linda, Sure hope you can keep politics out of your blog. I come here for peace and to learn what’s new with you. God Bless You for the effort it takes to keep a blog going.
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I don’t post politics. I’m sorry you feel like I did. My Dad told me when I was a little girl—the quickest way to lose friends is to talk about Religion or Politics. I have always approached my life that way.
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Terry is down getting the corn tested this morning. We know it’s still a little too wet, but getting closer.
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it’s gotten so I don’t especially mind MILD unease, etc. THAT seems to be a constant.
and (does it really?) it helps? when one brings the unease upon oneself, such as my bi-weekly facing of MEN (& WOMEN) WITH PUCKS. I’ve had moments of borderline terror, which subsides into just a state of mild alarm after a while …
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You are one brave HOCKEY PLAYER!!
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no, but it’s gotten to be a vital part of my weekly retired-senior-citizen schedule. the pick-up leagues NEED goalies (they usually have enough players) so I agreed to try be regular years ago.
now, the Terry on/ATV photo shows San Juans to south in the distance — I think I recognize Uncompahgre Peak? and those dazzling (sunset photos, right?) ~ or are they a.m.? (I’ve gotten so lazy I usually miss the sunrise…)
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Goalie!!! WOW! You are the key to the game!
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the people who regularly show up to play prefer a PERSON (no matter how inept) rather than the “fake goalie” / ‘shooter-tutor’ thing stretched over a goal. (I h8 those things — they have better stats than I do !)
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You made me laugh!!!!
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& that is a (sort of) service I provide to the games — plus I make everyone on the OTHER team happy!
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🙂
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I’ll say some extra prayers for you. The rest of this country and the world are already on my list. I think we are all waiting for the other shoe to drop. I still keep an eye on the news but like I’ve said many times, I tape it, watch in fast forward with the sound off until there is something I need to know about. I get the gist without being beaten with the news. It’s how I cope with the conflict that’s generated these days. You will be in my thoughts.
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Thank you….I can’t even bring myself to do that. Good for you!
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I hope the foreboding feelings leave you soon, they are no fun…usually mine are unwarrented and nothing drastic happens that I know of:)
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I hope so also…they sure a anxiety producing!
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Thinking of you dear Linda .. I hope you are feeling easier now! Big hugs from NZ
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I’m trying to ignore it and look at only good things…works most of the time. Thank you, Julie!
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It’s a year later, and I found this post because I feel this way now, and remembered that I felt the same a year ago. I was visiting my mother and said it felt like the end of the world was coming and she said she felt the same way. When it started again this year, it made me wonder whether this type of vague anxiety rising in Fall is a thing. I’m in/from Southern California, so it’s not falling leaves or wintry weather triggering it for me – maybe it’s the angle of the sun. The worst part is the feeling that no matter where in the world I might travel (even Spring in Australia), I wouldn’t shake it.
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I still have that feeling…and I don’t think it is a Autumn thing….I wish I could figure it out!
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