Kitty Hospice—Tuesday, December 12, 2017

My precious, sweet, loving kitty–Sammy-Sam, is sick.  Very sick.  It all started this late summer, although, I didn’t realize it.

See his cheek on this side facing us?

He has a cancer growing there. It breaks my heart.

Sammy has been with us a long-long-long time. He is a year older than Blade, our grandson.

Right now all we can do is keep him happy…whatever that is–

Gradually the meat grinder of a cancer will completely close off his throat—it hasn’t yet—but the time is coming.

So I give him anything and everything he could ever possibly want to eat…Milk (yes Milk–he loves it and tolerates it.) He gets little dribs and drabs of it.  Tuna in the canned for humans, which I mash up into teeny tiny bits, his very special roll on the ground it tastes so good expensive canned cat food, cooked chicken, beef, or turkey shredded into itsy bitsy pieces, and his all time favorite of all time…lunch meat sliced very thin—of which I once more tear into bits so small he can capture them on one claw and put them in his mouth.

When Boomer was horribly sick Sammy stayed by Boomer giving him strength and comfort–so now Boomer seems to have a watchful eye on Sam.

For years he slept on the bed, but since this slow suffocation has begun he likes to sleep in my sewing chair or by the wood stove—I check on him often throughout the night.

How can I not.

I also had to make the decision to ‘make’ him stay inside or to let him come and go as he wants.

I made the decision to let him come and go as he wants.

“You know”, I was told…”you might lose him out there.  He just might die someplace out there on your farm and you won’t be able to find him”.

I know.

But he has always been and indoors/out-doors kind of cat.  Mostly outdoors.  I refuse to take his freedom away from him now.

So 

So—-

Until that day comes, however it comes, I will do everything I can to make his life good.

I will still take him with me to gather wood in the wheel barrel, I will feed him whatever he wants, I have even got him some medical hemp to help him with pain management

And sometimes, well, lots of time, I will cry as I hold him, or when he and I sit quietly outside smelling the air, and I will tell him in no uncertain words how much I love him, but if and when he ready, even in the midst of my despair, I will honor his wish and let him go.

But right now, today, as I right this he isn’t ready.  So we continue on with Kitty Hospice my last gift to him.

Your friend on a western Colorado Farm,

Linda

 

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66 thoughts on “Kitty Hospice—Tuesday, December 12, 2017

  1. Having lost Sassy this past January I do know what you are going through waiting for their time!! I continue to lose control seeing her pictures and her birthday was on the 8th and I’ve been so tearful ever since that morning. It’s so very, very hard to let them go. I’ll keep you and Sammy in my prayers and hope he is not in a lot of pain!! Love ya, Linda!!!
    Rita

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  2. Make me cry for all involved in your “Hospice.” Boomer is going to feel the loss of his buddy. I’m betting Fuzzy will be at the Rainbow Bridge to escort Sam-Sam over. Lots of hugs for all of you. Sandy

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  3. I got teary eyed reading this post. We are cat lovers too and have had quite a few of them cross over the Rainbow Bridge over the years. It is never easy. Give Sammy a special pat from us.

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  4. Oh Linda, I am so sorry! I have held furbabies in my arms and cried when I knew they were near time to go to the rainbow bridge to wait for us. The kindest thing we can do for them is not let them suffer. I would rethink letting Sammy out all night. In his weakened state any critter might take him out. I still sadly think about one of my kitties that went missing one night on our ranch…not knowing is awful hard….we imagine all sorts of things. Give him a hug for me.

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    • Oh I don’t let him out at night. He goes out with me when I’m out there. You are so right there are fox, owls, coyotes and feral cats and dogs. No he stays inside with me—When I go out to work I let him come with me and we work together…he doesn’t stray far….not now, not anymore

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  5. I’m so sorry to hear about Sammy. The hemp oil worked a lot for Russell Sprout; I’m sure it will help Sammy too. It won’t work miracles at this stage, but it helps. Hospice is hard on those of us holding space for loved ones, but it is what love is all about. I’m glad he has you. Sending hugs to you both through the ether.♥️

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  6. When my time comes, can I come over to yours to be looked after? Seriously, you’re giving him the best end-of-life time a cat could ask for, and I know that will help when he’s not around to wind around your ankles any more…

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  7. Oh Sam ♡ As you know, you have the best Mom ever ~ and the best friends, near & far – four & two legged, who hold you dear. Glad you are taking the hemp for relief. Explore with Boomer as you can, let those close carry your slippers for you… We all care ’bout ya, sweet kitty =^•^=
    )))hugs((( for you, Linda ~ I know how hard this is on you and Terry ♡

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  8. My beloved Oscar-cat was only 7 when we noticed a lump on his hip. I was totally unprepared for the diagnosis of cancer, although we had lost his brother to that several years earlier. It is as you say, the pampering, the cuddling and holding. I even placed a bench beside the bed to that he could climb up to sleep with me when the tumor grew large enough to impede an easy jump. Our vet said, “You’ll know when to bring him back.”
    I took him in, that final kindness, when we saw that he was too weary to go on. He was on my lap all the 30 miles to the vet’s office, purring, while I drove the truck, nearly blinded at times with tears. He was purring when the needle went in.
    We do this because a life without animal companions would be too lonely.

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  9. I’m so sorry to hear about your Sammy. What a beautiful kitty. I agree with your decision to let him continue to come and go as he pleases. You will always be glad you allowed him to have his freedom right up to the end. It’s the one thing that is really hard about pets….the deep hurt when they leave us. I still grieve my favorite pets many years later. But my life was richer for having had them as a part of my life.

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  10. Oh Linda, my heart goes out to you, and I know how you feel. My precious darling had cancer too… for six months the vet gave her steroids every six weeks, which really helped. And then one morning I knew it was time. I thought my heart would break. My very first blog was about her, called Goodbye Cat.
    Thinking of you both with much love and knowing that your darling could n;t feel more loved with all the tender care she has from you – and Boomer… XXXX

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  11. You will know when the time is right to say goodbye. I am so sorry he has that darn cancer, we had a Grand kitty that spent a long time at our house with it. So sad. I am sad for you…it is really really hard. We are at the nursing home stage here…watch for falling down…and watch that he eats and drinks and poops and pees and doesn’t get lost outside. I have thought that he may wander off too…but we have snow so we could track him.
    Take good care of you…cause the animals need you! 😦

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  12. I was sorry to hear about Sammy and know the tug at the heart. You are a wonderful caregiver and I would probably make the same choices as you are making. I did not know about hemp oil or whatever it is you are using to ease the pain. I’ll keep you all in my prayers.

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  13. I’m so sorry to hear about Sammy-Sam. I had my dear Sunny who had cancer of the mouth and I had to feed him with a spoon. You’re doing the right thing, let him live as he always has as much as possible. He’ll let you know if it’s too much. I’ve held all my boys at the end, it was best for them and for me. I’m glad Boomer is watching over Sammy, they’ve been friends a long time too. Keeping you and yours in my prayers.

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  14. I am so sorry for all of you! I wish I knew something wise and wonderful and healing and comforting to say, but all I come up with is the old trite things.
    I am so glad you will make the right decision when the time comes. Having had to do it way too many times, we are still glad we did it. I am reduced to euphemisms.

    God Bless you for all the love and care you are giving Him.

    You are all in our prayers.

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  15. I’m so sorry, dear. With so much going on of a harvest season, it is understandable you didn’t notice right away. Especially with a mostly outdoor kitty off doing kitty things all day! Sam knows, as you know, as i do too, that you will do your very best to make sure he doesn’t have a hard end.
    Ps. I tried to comment earlier via my phone, but I couldn’t remember my password!

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  16. I’m not sure if it is better to have the ‘long goodbye’ so that you can provide comfort, or an instant demise as happened with our dog of 17 years. He didn’t suffer, at least, but oh did we grieve. I’m so sorry for you. Knowing we all must eventually die just doesn’t help get through it all. Warm hugs.

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  17. hello linda its dennis the vizsla dog hay i am verry sorry to heer that yore sweet kitty sammy is sick i do not like the c wurd as the c wurd is wot tuk my sister trixie away!!! i am sending sammy and yoo lots of vizsla tail wags that sammy kontinyooz to feel wel for a long long time and the hipster kitties send purrs!!! ok bye

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